28 December 2007

My Sad Christmas Story

My family and close friends might say I did the best that I could given the situation, or maybe they think I bring all this drama on myself. Maybe they're thinking I should have known better.

I was at my mom's house in New Mexico when I received a call from my ex's sister. I missed the call. Then 20 minutes later I get a call from my ex. He left a voicemail asking that I call him as soon as possible. Now, I'm not even sure what to think, so I waited a few minutes and called my ex. He says's his sister bought him tickets to fly out here to see our son for Christmas and he wanted to know what our plans were for that week. I told him that at the moment we didn't have plans so I would work with him to make arrangements so we could all do our thing. He didn't know the flight schedule so we left it at that. He would be here the day before Christmas Eve, and leave sometime on Christmas Day.

As soon as I found out, I let my boyfriend know that he was coming to see my son. I know in the back of his mind he was not thrilled, but he did not show his concern, he just said that would be great since my son hasn't seen his dad in over a year and a half. He didn't have to say much, but just knowing both of these men the way I do, Christmas week was going to be a tough one to get though to keep both of them happy. The following week my ex called and let me know he was going to buy all the Santa gifts and there would be some from him as well. I was glad to hear that he was finally stepping up and putting in some effort to help out. When I told my boyfriend, he got mad at me for letting my ex do what he wants to help out when he wants. I got a little defensive and told him I was not going to turn down any help that my ex offered because it was far and few in between when he did help. My boyfriend still did not see it my way. I was pretty upset with my boyfriend over his comment, so for the next few days we struggled to stay calm around each other.

To make a long story short, when my ex finally found out his flight schedule, he called me and said he would be in early Dec. 23rd and out late Dec. 25th. When he arrived on the 23rd, he was going to come by and pick up our son, and spend the day with him and he would keep him overnight. He mentioned coming over and hanging out Christmas Eve. WHAT? Wait... he wants to come here and hang out, on a Sunday? I didn't know he even wanted to be around me. It had not even crossed my mind that this was the reason he kept asking me if he was imposing...I also had to keep in mind he was coming here after a year and a half and that my son may feel a bit awkward and may not want to go with him right away. Also, spending the day in a hotel room is not really appealing around the holidays. I knew my boyfriend was not going to be happy with this suggestion one bit. I mentioned to him that my ex would be over for a while on Monday and that's where the problems started. I believe this was the Wednesday before Christmas. We argued, we went to bed mad, we woke up mad and didn't speak the next morning. We argued over text, then he came over late that night, and we yelled at each other some more. I was so furious over his comments, his opionions, and what seemed to be jealous behavior that I broke up with him and asked him to get his stuff and leave...and he did. That was Thursday night.

Friday, we argued over text more, and then I talked to my ex and we discussed his plans for the time he would be here. I tried to make arrangements for both of them to be comfortable, and to where they would not feel awkward being around each other for long periods of time. My ex and I are not divorced yet, but it is in the process. I have been with my boyfriend almost a year. After I broke up with my boyfriend, I felt really crappy. How could I do this to him right before Christmas? This is probably the #1 No-no rule when breaking up with someone. Now he was going to be unhappy and I was going to be unhappy. I called him and made ammends and we made plans to hang out on Sunday. I did however manage to hurt his feelings again by saying that we would be hanging out "just as friends". Why do I keep doing this to myself.

My ex arrived Dec. 23rd @ 11am. We greeted each other, he came in, I got my son dressed and they left. So far, everything was cool. I called my now ex-boyfriend so we could hang out and we had a good day. My son seemed to be just fine with his dad and he stayed the night. The next day was Monday, and my now ex-boyfriend had to work, so I didn't have to worry about any run-ins with the two of them. After my son and his dad did their running around and shopping, they invited me to the mall. I can be civil and hang out and see a movie and pretend to still be a family. We watched the movie, and then after the movie, we went back to my place. The plan was for me to make lunch and we were going to eat, but as soon as he came in he said he felt awkward and left. I called him back and apparently he said he felt like he was here in our life but one that he was not a part of...which is true. I still have all the same furniture, but there are no pictures of my ex anywhere in my house. He has to understand that my son and I are moving on without him. He walked out on us.

Anyway, I talked him into coming back and we had lunch and we discussed the divorce, child support and him getting some of his personal things back. Then he proceeded to tell me how the feelings he thought were passed him came back when he saw me and that was why he felt awkward. Our relationship is over, but since we haven't had to deal with each other face to face for over a year it was easier...out of sight, out of mind. He gathered his belongings and he left again, and he left me crying. I was feeling bad for him because he said he had been living in his van for over a month to save up money to come see his son and spend it on him for Christmas. He said he regreted leaving us and wished he could change things. When my son saw me crying, he began to cry. He said he was sad because he would never see his dad again. I've always reassured him that his dad is trying his best to do the right thing to move back to Texas to be close to him again. I cried that night the hardest I have cried in over a year. I think I needed it more than I knew. It felt good to finally let some of those emotions go and to stop bottling it in because I was making myself angry, and the anger is what I express to everyone around me.

So, the day my ex showed up, he presented my son with a cellphone. He said he figured if his son had his own cellphone he would call him more often. It was an extra line on his plan so it would not cost me anything. I agreed to let him keep it and use it under my supervision. Christmas Eve night, my son picked up the phone and asked me how to send a text message to his dad. I was about to show him, and I noticed my ex had left 500 sent messages on the phone. Now, tell me, what would you do in this case? Would you respect his privacy and just delete the messages? Would you read them and see what he's been up to lately?

Knowing the type of person he is, and the shit he gets into, I decided to read them. I didn't see anything interesting in the first 6 messages, so I was just about to go ahead and delete them all when I saw message #7. This was to someone referred to as "slut". The message read "call me when you get a chance." I was interested to know who he was referring to this way, so i found the next message with the same name. The message read " I told you I got him a psp, spongebob operation, transformers, a couple of games for the psp and some other things". It hit me like a ton of bricks! That was the conversation I had with him two weeks ago...I'm the one he's referring to as "slut"! What the hell? Why would he disrespect me like this? Is he that much of a dumbass that he forgot to clear out these messages and he has the nerve to have me in his contacts as "slut"! I was furious. I was so angry, I read each and every text he left on that phone. I found out some pretty bad things and I documented names and phone #'s. If I have to, I will use this information against him in court if he tries to screw with me one more time. He has what he deserves coming to him.

I called my now ex-boyfriend to talk to him because I wanted him to come over to my family's house on Christmas. We had already planned the day this way but I was not sure if he was still going to be there or not. I apologized to him for my actions the last few days and I told him I was sorry for being so harsh on him. I explained to him what I found out about my ex and I told him I was planning to confront him the next morning. He was concerned for my safety and suggested he be there just in case. My ex has a bad temper and given the things I was going to bring up, I felt better knowing that I was not putting myself or my son in harms way. The next morning, my ex was waiting for me to call him to come over. I guess he figured i had company, so he sent me a text saying he was going to see about catching an early flight out. I told him to come over, I was still getting ready but he needs to see his son before he leaves and say good-bye. Before he made it over, my now ex-boyfriend showed up. I sent my ex a text to let him know he was there, but wouldn't you know it, the text didn't get delivered until 45 minutes too late. My ex walked in the door, I told him the boyfriend was in the kitchen, and he turned around and walked out. He was cussing and pissed at me for not calling and so I followed him out. I told him to at least say bye to his son, whom was standing right behind me at the moment. He said "I love you son" and kept walking. Wait, he can't leave! I had something to say to him... so across the parking lot I yelled out "thanks for all those lovely text messages you left on the phone for me to read!" He kept walking but turned around and said "what the hell are you talking about? What text messages?" I went back inside because I feared he was going to come back and start some shit with me.

He left, but he called me back. We argued for another 15 minutes on the phone. He denied everything. I told him that was fine, he could deny all he wanted but I had all the proof I needed on this phone to show in court. He made all kinds of excuses of why this said this and that said that...but it's all good. I learned my lesson, again. I cannot trust that man and he will never do right by me. He can live his life the way he wants, but he will have to do it without his son. I will never let my son go to stay with him where he is now, not around that family of his. How could I be so stupid to think that he was changing, that he had realized the error of his ways. I thought he had done some growing and maturing over this last year. I was SO WRONG. He is still the same scumbag he has been since I met him. He will never change and I have to accept that. He did get any early flight out that day and I have not heard from him since. I guess we managed to ruin each others Christmas without really trying.

Now, I'm trying to fix my relationship with my now ex-boyfriend. I was very angry at him for not understanding my situation and for having an opinion on how he thought I should have been handling things. We seem to have a disconnect when it comes to communicating with each other because we say all the wrong things to each other and the wrong time. Then later, after our fall-out, we say the right thing but by then we are both tired and hurt and licking our wounds. I didn't realize that he was trying to express something to me one way, and I saw it as jealousy. I've had my head hung down in shame the last few days for not seeing him for the loving, caring man that he is...with him I don't have to worry about all the things that my ex put me through. I never wanted to compare him to my ex, but this weekend was a wake up call for me. In order to move on from my ex and see him for what he is, I need to see what I have right in front of me now and realize how much better things are and will be.

Freedom of expression is a great thing, but sometimes you can have to much of a good thing. Sometimes you can express yourself freely to much or to the wrong person. Sometimes you speak before you think, or you freely express yourself out of anger and once those expressions are heard...its too late to take it back. I went from holding it all in and not telling anyone anything, to letting it all out and telling everyone what I thought right then and there. Now, I'm learning to say what I mean, and mean what I say.

22 December 2007

Why Am I Married...

You have two choices in life:
You can stay single and be miserable,
or get married and wish you were dead.
__________
At a cocktail party, one woman said to another,"
Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?"
"Yes, I am. I married the wrong man."
__________
A lady inserted an ad in the classifieds:
"Husband Wanted".
Next day she received a hundred letters.
They all said the same thing:
"You can have mine."
__________
When a woman steals your husband,
there is no better revenge than to let her keep him.
__________
A woman is incomplete until she is married.
Then she is finished.
__________
A little boy asked his father,
"Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?"
Father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying."
__________
A young son asked,
"Is it true Dad, that in some parts of Africa
a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?"
Dad replied, "That happens in every country, son."
__________
Then there was a woman who said,
"I never knew what real happiness was until I got married,
and by then, it was too late."
__________
Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence.
__________
If you want your spouse to listen
and pay strict attention to every word you say --talk in your sleep.
__________
Just think, if it weren't for marriage,
men would go through life thinking they had no faults at all.
__________
First guy says, "My wife's an angel!"
Second guy remarks, "You're lucky, mine's still alive."
__________
"A Woman's Prayer:
Dear Lord, I pray for: Wisdom, To understand a man , to Love and to forgive him ,
and for patience, For his moods.
Because Lord, if I pray for Strength I'll just beat him to death"
__________
AND NOW FOR THE FAVORITE!!!
Husband and wife are waiting at the bus stop with their nine children. A blind man joins them after a few minutes. When the bus arrives, they find it overloaded and only the wife and the nine kids are able to fit onto the bus.
So the husband and the blind man decide to walk. After a while, the husband gets irritated by the ticking of the stick of the blind man as he taps it on the sidewalk, and says to him, "Why don't you put a piece of rubber at the end of your stick? That ticking sound is driving me crazy."
The blind man replies, "If you had put a rubber at the end of YOUR stick, we'd be riding the bus, so shut the hell up."

Elf Yourself™...

Ok people -

I don't care who you are, this is freakin' hilarious!

  1. First watch this short clip...
  2. Then, let me know what you think about me and my cooky friends!
  3. And finally, follow the instructions to ElfYourself™. (Please, please DO send me the link if you choose not to post it for everyone to see! )



I would hope that anyone that reads my page will have a great sense of humor and go ahead and follow this thru completely as I would love to see all of you looking just as ridiculous as myself.

BTW, the elfing ends 1/2/08, so don't miss out!

Merry Christmas!

Happy Holidays!

Joy to the World!

All that hub-bub...

21 December 2007

Dear Santa...for moms!

Dear Santa,

I've been a good mom all year. I've fed, cleaned and cuddled my children on demand, visited the doctor's office more than my doctor and sold sixty-two cases of candy bars to raise money to plant a shade tree on the school playground. I was hoping you could spread my list out over several Christmases, since I had to write this letter with my son's red crayon, on the back of a receipt in the laundry room between cycles, and who knows when I'll find anymore free time in the next 18 years.

Here are my Christmas wishes:

I'd like a pair of legs that don't ache (in any color, except purple,which I already have) and arms that don't hurt or flap in the breeze, but are strong enough to pull my screaming child out of the candy aisle in the grocery store. I'd also like a waist, since I lost mine somewhere in the seventh month of my last pregnancy.

If you're hauling big ticket items this year I'd like finger-print resistant windows and a radio that only plays adult music, a television that doesn't broadcast any programs containing talking animals, and a refrigerator with a secret compartment behind the crisper where I can hide to talk on the phone.

On the practical side, I could use a talking doll that says, "Yes, Mommy" to boost my parental confidence, along with two kids who don't fight and three pairs of jeans that will zip all the way up without the use of power tools. I could also use a recording of Tibetan monks chanting "Don't eat in the living room" and "Take your hands off your brother," because my voice seems to be just out of my children's hearing range and can only be heard by the dog.

If it's too late to find any of these products, I'd settle for enough time to brush my teeth and comb my hair in the same morning, or the luxury of eating food warmer than room temperature without it being served in a Styrofoam container. If you don't mind, I could also use a few Christmas miracles to brighten the holiday season. Would it be too much trouble to declare ketchup a vegetable? It will clear my conscience immensely. It would be helpful if you could coerce my children to help around the house without demanding payment as if they were the bosses of an organized crime family.

Well, Santa, the buzzer on the dryer is calling and my son saw my feet under the laundry room door. I think he wants his crayon back. Have a safe trip and remember to leave your wet boots by the door and come in and dry off so you don't catch a cold. Help yourself to cookies on the table but don't eat too many or leave crumbs on the carpet. (You promised me last year you would lose some weight with me so next year you and I could be a cute size two brunette...ok, some requests go too far, but none the less....

Yours Always,

MOM

...P.S.
One more thing...you can cancel all my requests if you can keep my children, healthy, safe and of course, young enough to always believe in Santa.

The Greatest Irony of Love

Loving the right person at the wrong time, Having the wrong person when the time is right, and finding out that you love someone right after that person walks out of your life....

And sometimes, you think that you're already over a person, but when you see them smile at you, You'll suddenly realize that you're just pretending to be over them just to ease the pain of knowing that they will never be yours again.....

Most relationships tend to fail not because the absence of love. Love is always present. Its just that one is being loved too much and the other was being loved too little...

As we know, the heart is the center of the body but it beats on the left. Maybe thats the reason why the heart isn't always right..

Most often we fall in love with the person we think we love but to only discover that for them we are just passing time, while the one who truly loves us, remains either a friend or a stranger....

So here's a piece of advice; Let go when you're hurting too much, Give up when love just isn't enough, and move on when things are not like before....

Its certain... There is someone out there

Who will love you even more.......

Letters to Santa

Dear Santa,
I wud like a kool toy space ranjur fer Xmas. Iv ben a gud boy all yeer.

yer Frend,
BiLLy


Dear Billy,
Nice spelling. You're on your way to a career in lawn care. How about I send you a friggin' book so you can learn to read and write? I'm giving your older brother the space ranger. At least HE can spell!

Santa

________________________________________

Dear Santa, I have been a good girl all year, and the only thing I ask for is peace and joy in the world for everybody!

Love,
Sarah

Dear Sarah,
Your parents smoked pot when they had you, didn't they?

Santa

________________________________________

Dear Santa,
I don't know if you can do this, but for Christmas, I'd like for my mommy and daddy to get back together. Please see what you can do.

Love,
Teddy

Dear Teddy,
Look, your dad's banging the babysitter like a screen door in a hurricane. Do you think he's gonna give that up to come back to your frigid mom, who rides his ass constantly? It's time to give up that dream. Let me get you some nice Legos instead.
Santa

________________________________________

Dear Santa,
I want a new bike, a Playstation, a train, some G.I. Joes, a dog, a drum set, a pony and a tuba.

Love,
Francis

Dear Francis,
Who names their kid 'Francis' nowadays? I bet you're gay; I'll set you up with a Barbie.

Santa
____________________________________________

Dear Santa,
I left milk and cookies for you under the tree, and I left carrots for your reindeer outside the back door.

Love,
Susan

Dear Susan,
Milk gives me the runs and carrots make the deer fart in my face when riding in the sleigh. You want to do me a favor? Leave me a bottle of scotch.

Santa

________________________________________

Dear Santa,
What do you do the other 364 days of the year? Are you busy making toys?

Your friend,
Thomas

Dear Thomas,
All the toys are made in China . I have a condo in Vegas, where I spend most of my time making low-budget porno films. I unwind by drinking myself silly and squeezing the asses of cocktail waitresses while losing money at the craps table.

Hey, you wanted to know.
Santa

_________________________________________

Dear Santa,
Do you see us when we're sleeping, do you really know when we're awake, like in the song?

Love,
Jessica

Dear Jessica, Are you really that gullible or are you just a blonde? Good luck in whatever you do. I'm skipping your house.

Santa

________________________________________

Dear Santa, I really really want a puppy this year. Please please please PLEASE PLEASE could I have one?

Timmy

Timmy,
That whiney begging shit may work with your over-indulgent folks, but that crap doesn't work with me. You're getting a sweater again.

Santa

________________________________________

Dearest Santa,
We don't have a chimney in our house, how do you get into our home?

Love,
Marky

Mark,
First, stop calling yourself 'Marky', that's why you're getting your ass whipped at school. Second, you don 't live in a house; you live in a low-rent apartment complex. Third, I get inside your pad just like the boogeyman does; through your bedroom window.

Sweet Dreams,
Santa

8 Random Facts about Me!

Hip Mommy tagged me to list 8 Random Facts About Me!

Instructions: When tagged, you have to link to the person who tagged you. Post the rules just before your list, then list eight random facts about yourself. At the end of your post, you must tag and link to eight other people.

1- My favorite holiday is Valentines...I'm a sucker for hearts!

2- My eyesight is bad, therefore I wear contact and occasionally glasses.

3- I have 5 tattoos - and that includes my eyebrows.

4- My favorite T.V. show is CSI (Las Vegas more than Miami)

5- My favorite NFL team has to be the Dallas Cowboys!

6- I enjoy making home cooked meals, but do go out every once in a while.

7- Something I like about myself physically: my feet, they're very pretty.

8- I have never been to California or New York, but I hope to some day soon.

Eight people I will tag:

Douglas: http://www.informativepost.com/
Becca: http://www.letsbitch.com/
Betsy Lou: http://www.prettypatrol.com/
Luis Hipolito: http://luishipolito.blogspot.com/
Oylinki: http://oylinki.com/blog
BloggerNoob: http://www.bloggernoob.com/
FishHawk: http://fishhawkdroppings.blogspot.com/
Brent: http://www.ominouscomma.com/

20 December 2007

Emotionally numb

I literally just broke up with my boyfriend of 10 months...should I be crying or upset? Well, I'm not. I'm not sure exactly how I feel. Am I relieved? Yeah, somewhat. Will I miss him tomorrow? Umm, most likely. Will I take him back? No one knows for sure.

I know that he made me furious tonight. We argued about my ex-husband coming to town for Christmas to see our son. (Truthfully he's not my ex-husband yet because officially we are not divorced, but it's in the works.) Is this what added fuel to the fire? Yes, of course. There are some jealousy issues that he had that I just did not like about him and seem obvious that I was not able to just overlook. There were other things as well, but this was the BIG one. I'm a very hard person to talk to when I'm angry because if you ask me a question I'll just agree to get you to leave me alone. So, he asked if I wanted him out and I shook my head yes. He's asked me that very question several times before and I just stared at him with a blank look, but tonight he got his answer. Granted it was not the answer he really wanted, but he got one.

I'm not playing stupid relationship games. I went through 10 years of hard times with the last one, and this one started early on giving me grief about petty shit and I knew it was not going to last. I kept trying to give him the benefit of the doubt thinking he would ease up once he became more secure with our relationship. Then this. My ex asked nicely if it would be ok for him to see his son during Christmas since he hasn't seen him in over a year and a half. I wasn't planning for him to hang out here, but then again I don't want my son to just hang out in a hotel when he could be here with the Christmas tree and the good food and warming up near the fireplace.

This is such a touchy subject, I could go on and on, but I'm going to spare everyone all the crap and just say that this really sucks and it was not what I intended to happen. There was some miscommunication - but this was not the first time. I think in the back of my mind I was ready for it to be over but I thought we were going to get through the holidays. I wanted to believe that he would have made a lasting impression over these next few days that would change the way I felt about him.

I hope I made the right decision for my son.

18 December 2007

Lost luggage

I have probably watched this clip 4 or 5 times, and it is still just as funny as the 1st time! I hope you all enjoy it just as much as I do.


Voted best short joke of 2006

For his birthday, little Joseph asked for a 10-speed bicycle. His father said, "Son, we'd give you one, but the mortgage on this house is $280,000 & your mother just lost her job. There's no way we can afford it."

The next day the father saw little Joseph heading out the front door with a suitcase. So he asked, "Son, where are you going?"

Little Joseph told him; "I was walking past your room last night and heard you telling Mom you were pulling out. Then I heard her tell you to wait because she was coming too. And I'll be damned if I'm staying here by myself with a $280,000 mortgage & no bike.

Don't drink from hotel room glasses

I've been seeing this around a lot and not sure if you have also. Just in case you haven't, it's good to be aware of this before traveling for the holidays.

Umm, for some reason the video will not embed correctly...

so CLICK HERE to watch!

13 December 2007

"It's Not Enough..."


It's Not Enough...

It's not enough to be smart,
you have to look like a model too
the quote "beauty is only skin deep"
turned out to be SO true

It's not enough to have a big heart
unless you've got the tits to compare
it becomes an obsession to look good for him
believe me, I know, I've been there

"If only I could look like them-
I wouldn't feel this guilt and shame"
'cause I'm not as pretty, I can't compete
but it's not just men who are to blame

Everytime you turn around
another female takes off her clothes
now, so many men expect from women
to act like kinky hoes

Still, I hold certain morals
there's a lot that I won't do
but I'm giving in little by little
just to have the likes of you

I blame you and you, and then there's me
hell, I blame everyone - it's all the same
we have all fallen victim, we've been brainwashed
to play this silly, sexist game


My ex had some issues with pornography and an obsession with sex, and it made me feel like I wasn't good enough...but that's not true. Men have a one track mind and most of the time they're thinking about sex. It took me a long time to be comfortable with myself, just the way GOD intended me to be.

I contemplated plastic surgery for years - but after watching several hours of that Dr. 90210 show, I decided it was not for me...and not to mention that I didn't have the money to do it anyway!

I would like to hear from someone that has had plastic surgery for cosmetic reasons. I want to know if it was worth it and if it made you feel better about yourself then, and if you still feel good about your decision today.

12 December 2007

Not your ordinary Sunday cartoon!

CALVIN AND THE SNOWMEN















Here's another attempt

Here is a poem that I wrote sometime around June 2000. I had a lot going on around that time as my writing will reflect. After you read it, let me know what you think.

My Vice

You linger around
I smell your sweet scent
I'm feeling spellbound
that was the intent

it's because of you
that I can't cope with this place
you are my vice
you are my disgrace

first thing in the morning
in the middle of the day
late in the afternoon
I'm feeling ok

I can put it down
but I don't want to quit
'cause then I'd be sober
and right now I can't handle it

you're somewhat of an addiction
I can let you go
but you follow me around
like my own damn shadow

its a hard habit to break
when you make me feel so good
and I don't want to quit it
even though I should


I struggled with many issues in my early adult years...drugs, money problems, marital problem, sexual problems, emotional distress - and I survived. There were many days that I wished the world would end and I prayed for Armageddon. There are still days that I want to give up, or worse even, give in to my cravings for some of those things in my past that I thought were comforting. I have enough common sense to know that they were not helping, only numbing me for a short while. Then when you get back to reality, everything that you try to get away from is there, staring you in the face, waiting for you to figure out how to deal with it.

This message is to anyone right now that is struggling with any or all of the above issues - hold your head up and believe in yourself and you will get thru this. No one in this world can help you unless you are willing to help yourself. The grass is greener on the other side. Get help, get better and put this all behind you.

10 December 2007

T'was the Night Before Christmas - Tex/Mex Style

T'was the night before Christmas and all through la casa
Not a creature was stirring, only the masa.

Mama making tamales con mucho cuidado
In hopes old Santa would feel obligado
To bring all the hijos, both buenos y malos
A nice batch of dulces and other regalos

Mis hermanos and I went to sleep in our camas
Some in calsones, some in piyamas
Cuando out in the yard I heard un gran grito
That I jumped to my feet like a frightened cabrito

And who in the world do you think que era?
El mero mero with his venados estaban afuera
Santa Claus in a sleigh with a big sombrero
Came dashing along like a little bombero

I watched as they came, and this little fat hombre
Was shouting and whistling, and calling by nombre
'Ay PEPE, AY JESSE, AY CUCA, AY BETO
AY PANCHO, AY CHATO, CHUY Y NETO!'

Then standing straight up, with his hands on his pecho,
He flew to the top of our very own techo
With his round little belly like a bowl of jalea
He struggled to squeeze down our old chimenea

Then huffing and puffing, and a little cansado
He picked up a bag that looked so pesado
He filled all the stockings with lovely regalos
For none of the hijos had been very malos

Then chuckling aloud, seeming very contento
He turned like a flash and was gone like the viento
As I heard him exclaim and this is verdad,
'MERRY CHRISTMAS A TODOS! FELIZ NAVIDAD!'

07 December 2007

Poetry anyone?

I don't claim to be a poet, or good at writing poetry, but I have a few pieces I put down on paper that I would like to share. If you have any comments, good or bad, I would like to know.

My struggle

I had lost all ambition
Motivation was fading fast
I remembered having plans and goals
but that was all in the past

Couldn't afford to go to college
didn't qualify for financial aid
missed out on all the scholarships
because I didn't make the grade

now I'm struggling early in life
trying to make ends meet
living paycheck by paycheck
week after week

I felt like the whole world was against me
making it harder for me to survive
if it wasn't for those who love me
right now - I wouldn't be alive

but I'm thankful that I'm still around
to learn from my mistakes
and I look forward to the day
that I finally get a break

I hope it comes soon though
I feel I'm being put to the test
I'm just so damn tired
I want to take a rest

But I've got to keep my head up
do something about the bad mood
try to see the good in all that happens
and keep a positive attitude

so if I go off at the mouth
you've got to keep reminding me
that I made a promise to myself
to strive for a better "me"!

Drama, drama, drama!

Ok, there's this chic that I work with that is really pissing me off and now I have to speak my mind about it. She has proven herself to be a control freak, acting like mother hen around here trying to be Queen B...

She moved here around June/July this year from the office in OKC because she would be better utilized here. I wasn't so thrilled only becuase she and I never got off on the right foot when I started 2 years ago. Besides that, I had no personal issues with her.

The first issue started with the guy that was hired to replace me on the desktop support team, and she works with directly. Mind you, we are all on the same department team, but her and I are at different levels (she being desktop support where I moved up from, and I on the server admininstration team). Regardless what our titles and positions, we should be able to work with each other and help one another out and share our knowledge. She reported him and another guy a couple of times now for horseplaying and something else - but get this...she and this guy hang out on the weekends and he does it not to hurt her feelings but he really doesn't like her personally. He's trying to keep it from affecting his work relationship with her. The other guy hates her ass and had himself moved across the room to get as far from her as possible. My understanding is he is currently seeking employment elsewhere because of her.

She and I have been cool with each other for a while - I have her on my friends list on MySpace (which by the way is about to be deleted after our little meeting this afternoon) and she smiles and jokes with me to my face at work so I just shrug most of it off as maybe she doesn't realize what she's doing. But, today I'm taking it personal since she made it an issue between the two of us.

OK... a few days ago my sis sent me this funky text message that says "scroll down to see Santa's penis". I scroll down and then the message proceeds to say "you perv, there is no such thing as Santa, you just wanted to see some d!@k!!!" Either I sent her the text inadvertently or it got back to her that I sent it to some others around her and now I've been reported to HR.

THIS MEANS WAR NOW B-EA-TCH!!!!

She totally disregarded the chain of command and went straight to HR, without even saying to me that hey, maybe she didn't like this kind of vulgarity and would prefer not to be on my distribution list. I'm not the first person she has thrown under the bus either so I'm not really worried about it other than if it gets any worse it could affect my payraise, my evaluation and all together my job in general. WHOA! This is very serious! Now, shes messing with my money, my livelihood, my success.

I'm not sweatin' it because my boss and my bosses boss have already talked to me about it a little; but for her to be so 2-faced, such a backstabber, I'm still trying to pick up my jaw from the floor. I was totally stunned. Yeah, maybe I was out of line sending a text message like that, but everyone that knows me, knows that it was a joke. It was sent to several people, not just her. Ugh! I could go on and on, but I'll do that in a later post. I have much to say about this subject.

06 December 2007

Last night I was in a panic

I was attempting to work on my blog, update it with a pretty little counter, change the layout or add a background pic or something, right? Well, I didn't figure it should be so hard for me since I work in the IT field, and I have html experience and I can read code, blah blah blah. Widgets are a new thing to me, and when I changed my layout last night, I did the backup of the layout prior, and changed it. I accepted the option to delete the widgets because, well, I did back up my data so I figured I would be able to go back to the data and pull the code and add it to the new layout. WRONG!!!!! The widgets somehow disappeared from both the .xml files that I had backed up on different pc's at different times of the day. WTF!!! How could this happen? It should not have happened, but somehow it did. Ugh, I hate computers, why am I in this field? Why do I continue to do this to myself as a hobby?

I had been working on this all day at work - instead of working. Don't hate! I have that liberty in my environment to slack every once in a while. I do my share of work when it's time... right now we are on a holiday freeze. I work for a financial company that deals with debit and credit transactions, banks and ATM's. So, no changes can be made to the production environment while the holiday spending is going on. So, I had time to dedicate to my blog. Obviously with 3 posts yesterday, I had A LOT of time. The posts are easy, its the damn layout that's kicking my ass. So, I attempted to replace the code with the file I had just backed up...widgets just disappeared. I was mad, right? So, I get my work laptop that had an earlier copy and I thought "ah ha, I'm smart because I have a double backup!" Not the case. The widgets never came back. I had to go back and manually reconfigure the damn widgets. I was not happy.

Now I have searched high and low and I have only found one layout so far that works in blogger that does not give me the stupid format error, but it deleted my widgets so now I have to spend more time reading and researching how to get the code for my widgets properly backed up or I have to leave it with the template I'm using now which is buggin' me.

I've read a ton of posts out there that supposedly show you the way to do all this, but maybe I'm just that thick headed that I don't get it. Maybe, itss too easy for my huge brain to comprehend (simple things are hard for geniuses... HA HA HA, yeah right). Maybe someone will feel sorry for my pathetic cry for help and hold my hand through the process until I get what I want - not likely. I'll just do what I do best and continue to bitch about it and figure it out the hard way.

05 December 2007

Wow, I've been tagged!

So, tagging is a good thing, I hear. A friendly blogger has linked me on their blog, so now it's my turn to share the love.

There are 4 questions that are posted that are to be answered when tagged, and I will proceed to tag 5 other bloggers. The cycle continues, and hopefully this will bring more traffic and readers to my site so maybe one day I can become the successful blogger that I strive to be. (Not sure why I strive for this, but maybe I'm just hungry for more success!)

Here are the 4 questions that were posed to me and my responses:

1) What did you accomplish this past week?

I accomplished to make it to Roswell, NM and back without being abducted by aliens, and without hurting anyone in the process (well, not physically anyway). For those of you that don't know me personally, I am a very angry person on most occasions and a daily threat from me is very common. I'll elaborate more in another post... next question.

2) Did anything not go as expected?

Hmm, no everything was just as I thought it would be.

I was bored as usual. My mom lives there and that is the only reason I continue to visit my birthplace because honestly, the small town is just not my cup of tea and the "alien attaction" is not at all attracting me to continue to go there. I do still find it funny to tell people "I arrived in Roswell in 1977" rather than to say I was born in 1977. Some people still find it slightly amusing when I say it.
I went to the souvenier shops and bought the cheesiest things I could find. A light up yo-yo with an alien face sticker, 2 shot glasses (one with a spaceship and one with the same alien face) and a keychain that says "get probed")because all the "good stuff" was sold out! Imagine that...

I'm not sure I can elaborate much more cuz I'm not sure who's reading this and I don't want offend anyone in particular, but I'll just say it was not a fun trip.

3) What was the highlight of your week?

Oooh, now this past week I adopted a cute little kitten for my son and I as an early Christmas gift. Her name is Tink (as in Tinkerbell) and she is a 2 month old blue domestic shorthair (blue being a blue gray color... she's not really blue, ha ha ha but it would be really cute if she was). Oh, and coming home from my trip to Roswell, because I can't reiterate enough how much I really don't like that place. It's just not for me.

4) Did anything exciting happen that you did not expect?
No, not really. Nothing exciting happened in Roswell, and I'm still waiting for something exciting to happen here at home.

So, that's it for me. Maybe if I'm lucky I'll get tagged again and I'll have more interesting things to talk about.

These are the 5 blogs that I'm tagging...

1) Here I am
2) All about the green
3) Everyone's reading it
4) Random good stuff
5) The Hipmommy's place

check them out and have a great day...everyday!

A ref makes a call that the player didn't like

Check out what this player does to the ref... sports have become way too violent these days!


WHY WE LOVE CHILDREN…

1) NUDITY
I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening when a woman in the convertible ahead of us stood up and waved. She was stark naked! As I was reeling from the shock, I heard my 5-year-old shout from the back seat, "Mom! That lady isn't wearing a seat belt!"

2) OPINIONS
On the first day of school, a first-grader handed his teacher a note from his mother. The note read, "The opinions expressed by this child are not necessarily those of his parents."

3) KETCHUP
A woman was trying hard to get the ketchup out of the jar. During her struggle the phone rang so she asked her 4-year-old daughter to answer the phone. "Mommy can't come to the phone to talk to you right now. She's hitting the bottle."

4) MORE NUDITY
A little boy got lost at the YMCA and found himself in the women's locker room. When he was spotted, the room burst into shrieks, with ladies grabbing towels and running for cover. The little boy watched in amazement and then asked, "What's the matter, haven't you ever seen a little boy before?

5) POLICE
It was the end of the day when I parked my police van in front of the station. As I gathered my equipment, my K-9 partner, Jake, was barking, and I saw a little boy staring in at me "Is that a dog you got back there?" he asked. "It sure is," I replied. Puzzled, the boy looked at me and then towards the back of the van. Finally he said, "What'd he do?"

6) ELDERLY
While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly shut-ins, I used to take my 4-year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds. She was unfailingly intrigued by the various appliances of old age, particularly the canes, walkers and wheelchairs. One day I found her staring at a pair of false teeth soaking in a glass. As I braced myself for the inevitable barrage of questions, she merely turned and whispered, "The tooth fairy will never believe this!"

7) DRESS-UP
A little girl was watching her parents dress for a party. When she saw her dad donning his tuxedo, she warned, "Daddy, you shouldn't wear that suit." "And why not, darling?" She replied "You know that it always gives you a headache the next morning. "

8) SCHOOL
A little girl had just finished her first week of school. "I'm just wasting my time," she said to her mother. "I can't read, I can't write and they won't let me talk!"

9) BIBLE
A little boy opened the big family bible. He was fascinated as he fingered through the old pages. Suddenly, something fell out of the Bible. He picked up the object and looked at it. What he saw was an old leaf that had been pressed in between the pages. "Mama, look what I found," the boy called out. "What have you got there, dear?" With astonishment in the young boy's voice, he answered, "I think it's Adam's underwear."

04 December 2007

Why men don't write advice columns!

Dear Walter:

I hope you can help me here. The other day I set off for work, leaving my husband in the house watching the TV as usual. I hadn't gone more than a mile down the road, when my engine conked out and the car shuddered to a halt.

I walked back home to get my husband's help. When I got home I couldn't believe my eyes: He was in the bedroom with a neighbor lady making mad passionate love to her.

I am 32, my husband is 34 and we have been married for twelve years.

When I confronted him, he tried to make out that he went into the back yard and heard a lady scream, had come to her rescue, but found her unconscious. He'd carried the woman back to our house, laid her in bed, and began CPR. When she awoke she immediately began thanking him and kissing him and he was attempting to break free when I came back.

But when I asked him why neither of them had any clothes on, he broke down and admitted that he'd been having an affair for the past six months. I told him to stop or I would leave him. He was let go from his job six months ago and he says he has
been feeling increasingly depressed and worthless. I love him very much, but
ever since I gave him the ultimatum he has become increasingly distant. I don't feel I can get through to him anymore. Can you please help?

Sincerely,

Mrs. Sheila Usk


===========================
Dear Sheila:

A car stalling after being driven a short distance can be caused by a variety of faults with the engine. Start by checking that there is no debris in the fuel line. If it is clear, check the jubilee clips holding the vacuum pipes onto the inlet manifold. If none of these approaches solves the problem, it could be that the fuel pump itself is faulty, causing low delivery pressure to the carburetor float chamber.

I hope this helps.

Walter